Can terrible two’s start early? I’m going to answer that for myself. Yes. Yes, they can. I don’t know if they’re so terrible though when they’re so stinkin’ cute. Exhausting. Yet cute. How do they learn so early to do the exact opposite of what you tell them?
“Ava, get down from there. You can’t stand on that.”
What’s that you say? Climb higher? Climb faster? Try and climb things as soon as you turn around? Announce that I’ve climbed something by yelling DOWN MAMA! DOWN!
“Ava, Please don’t hit Max. Be nice.”
Ok mama. Pull Max’s hair and tail? Slap his back? Kick his bone away from him? Give punches to his ribcage and roundhouses to his snout?
“Ava, please don’t crumple those cards.”
Ok. I’ll just crumple, tear, and shred them instead while I chomp on them with my new teeth.
“Ava, you should be nice to your baby doll.”
Alright, mama. But I’m just going to throw her down the stairs a few more times and then against the wall a couple more times too.
“Ava, you can’t feed Max your dinner.”
Ok, but I’m just going to give him three more bites and then I’ll dump my plate on his back.
“Ava, you can’t throw books at people.”
Ok mama. I’m sorry. But I’m just going to throw one more when you’re not looking so it hits you right under the eye.
No matter what new waters we’re treading on here it’s fun, it’s a learning experience, and there’s no doubt about it. Kids are smart. Even at a year and a half.
But at the end of the night when she snuggles up on my lap and we read together and she wraps her little arms around my neck and gives kisses while whispering mama, all is forgiven.